Shopping Buddies: Good or Bad idea?

"Do you like it?"

It’s a simple question. The one you ask your shopping buddies.

You say it without thinking. In a fitting room, in front of a mirror, or mid-scroll with a screenshot already copied.

But here's the thing, the second you ask, you already know. There's this gut feeling you had before the question even formed. You liked it, or you didn't.

Then someone answers. And suddenly, you're not so sure anymore.

What actually happens

Shopping with a friend feels like a good idea. It's lighter, more fun.

You're not alone with your indecision. And sometimes it genuinely helps.

But it also does this other thing, it plants doubt where there wasn't any. You try something on, you look at yourself, you're forming a thought… and then you glance at them. And whatever you were about to decide kind of dissolves.

The mirror problem

The person next to you isn't a blank slate. They have their own taste, their own reference points, their own idea of what "works."

So when they say "that's not really you", what does that mean, exactly?

Half the time, it means: that's not really me.

When it's actually useful

Look, it's not all bad.

The right person can push you toward something you'd have walked right past. They notice things you miss. They hype you up when you need it.

That's the best version of shopping with someone, not someone who tells you what to pick, but someone who makes you braver about choosing.

I remember a particular shopping session with my husband when he brought me an unexpected skirt. If you know me you already know I prefer my denim most of the time.

But I tried it on because I was curious. I would have never gone for this skirt by myself but my husband push my curiosity. Now that skirt is in my closet and even if I don't wear skirt often I love it.

When it backfires

But sometimes you stop trusting yourself entirely. You wait. You look at them before you even look at yourself. Your opinion becomes a thing you form after theirs.

And slowly, without meaning to, your style stops being yours. It becomes a group project.

I remember a particular jacket I saw when I was teenager. I was with a group of friend and they litteraly told me to not take it. Why? Because it was "too much". My mistake that day is to have listen and later on I understood it was "too much" for them, not for me.

The actual question

It's not really should I shop alone or with someone?

It's: can you still hear your own instinct when someone else is talking?

Because you can love having company and still make the final call yourself.

At some point, you just have to pick without asking.